Comments on: Standard of Living FAIL http://www.whatwouldoptimusdo.com/2009/05/28/standard-of-living-fail/ Saving the world one question at a time Wed, 28 Apr 2010 17:46:31 +0000 http://wordpress.org/?v=2.9.2 hourly 1 By: Megatron http://www.whatwouldoptimusdo.com/2009/05/28/standard-of-living-fail/comment-page-1/#comment-498 Megatron Wed, 28 Apr 2010 17:46:31 +0000 http://www.whatwouldoptimusdo.com/?p=80#comment-498 DEAR EMBARRASSING YOURSELF: I think we both know the answer to your crippling little dilemma, but you’re too scared to say it - mountains of debt. It’s what this country was built on, and it’s time for some deficit spending to get your house and cars into shape. Get an addition with a dollar sign-shaped indoor pool, plunk down for a Hummer with diamond spinners…hell, buy some four finger rings and diamond studded grillz for the whole family. Yeah, I know those last two went out of style a while back but you should be able to get some good deals as long as you don’t mind second-hand orthidonture and catching a possible case of Thug Mouth, which is a tough thing in white people. You’ll notice I’m assuming you’re white, because only white people have “problems” this stupid. PS - You live in Ohio. How high could your neighbors’ standards possibly be? I’m pretty sure they’re going to be impressed with your magical indoor outhouse. Love, Megatron DEAR EMBARRASSING YOURSELF: I think we both know the answer to your crippling little dilemma, but you’re too scared to say it – mountains of debt. It’s what this country was built on, and it’s time for some deficit spending to get your house and cars into shape. Get an addition with a dollar sign-shaped indoor pool, plunk down for a Hummer with diamond spinners…hell, buy some four finger rings and diamond studded grillz for the whole family. Yeah, I know those last two went out of style a while back but you should be able to get some good deals as long as you don’t mind second-hand orthidonture and catching a possible case of Thug Mouth, which is a tough thing in white people. You’ll notice I’m assuming you’re white, because only white people have “problems” this stupid.

PS – You live in Ohio. How high could your neighbors’ standards possibly be? I’m pretty sure they’re going to be impressed with your magical indoor outhouse.

Love,
Megatron

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