Gay is the New Black
DEAR OPTIMUS: I am a gay man who has been with my partner for 31 years. I have a female friend, “Josie,” whom I have known for years. She holds an executive position in the local bank and must attend many fund-raisers. I have been her escort to many of them. Josie knows and likes my partner, and he has never had a problem with my going to these social events with her.
Recently Josie became engaged, and she is now married. I was invited to the wedding, but my partner was not included on the invitation. I chose not to attend because of it. I have not heard from her since. It has been almost four months.
Josie’s husband is a retired military man. I suspect she would rather not let him know about having a gay male couple as friends. Should I confront her or just end the friendship? — DON’T ASK OR TELL IN ALBUQUERQUE
BEGIN TRANSMISSION: DESTINATION (DON’T ASK OR TELL IN ALBUQUERQUE)
I have been monitoring the earthly transmissions you humans call “movies” with my good friend Spike, and based on our most recent research I believe you may have a case of the “Mondays.” You should “quit” your job, get “drunk,” and infect your company’s “database” with a virus to shave fractions of a cent off each transaction. Then you should burn the place down and move to a tropical island. I really don’t understand you humans. By the way, what does gay mean?
END TRANSMISSION
See Megatron’s Answer
See Dear Abby’s Answer